My Pottery creations so far ...

My Best and the only finished pot so far

The Leap Of Faith ...

I think this meditation sessions that I have discovered close to my office on Thursdays is something I have called from the universe to help me answer my unsolved questions that have been with me over the years or to learn new concepts of living a fulfilling life.

At today’s session a young mother Gayatri, shared a lovely experience with the group which I think is worth sharing with you all. Last 3 sessions I have been observing Gayatri, a very affectionate mother who dotes on her 4 year old son Nikhil. She is very expressive about her emotions, fears and observations.

Today she shared a fact that her little one was very fearful of darkness. So much so that she has to keep a light on all night so that he can sleep at peace. Few days back he came home very disturbed from his school and told her about a new auditorium in his school. He mentioned that the class teacher took them there for a visit. The auditorium was pitch dark and Nikhil’s fears took over. He told her that he cried so much that the teachers were forced to get him out of there. He was so full of fear that he was reluctant to go to school the next day. As Gayatri went to drop him to school today, on the way as usual Nikhil asked her to stop at the small Hanuman temple across the school. And as usual asked her to read “ Shree Ram Shree Ram Jai Jai Ram” written on the wall. Today to over come his fear Gayatri just asked him to call Hanumanji if ever he feared anything. She assured him that Hanumanji will come to his help.

In the evening Nikhil very happily came home and told Gayatri that his class visited the auditorium again. At first he was terrified of the darkness, but remembered his mom words. He excitedly told her that “Mommy, I was very scared but I called Hanumanji and then he came and stood by me …after that I didn’t feel scared”

While Nikhil is still struggling to over come his fear what Gayatri realized that little Nikhil with all his trust and complete faith in his mother’s words took the “Leap of faith” today. It was commendable how the little one could gather the courage and take the leap … then why all of us are still not being able to take the “Leap of faith” is a question Gayatri posed to the group. As for her this little incident made her take the “leap” today !

I think this is a message I was meant to receive from the universe today as an answer to a conflict in my mind whole of last week about how to ‘Surrender’ … it’s been on my mind all the way back home. I surely will attempt to take the leap as well and overcome my fears one by one …

Raghu Dixit Live at DHOOP

Dhoop as the name explains is a very warm, earthy and interesting art and craft store in Mumbai. They source and promote traditional handicrafts (contemporized it as well) from different villages in India. The use of natural products fibers and textures gives a refreshing look to all the home décor products sold there.

Raghu Dixit, my dear friend (of the ‘The Raghu Dixit Project’) was in town to sign up his contract with the Music Director duo Vishal and Shekhar . They will be soon launching his albums. Raghu invited me to a proactive gig at Dhoop (The store) on Tuesday evening. It was a small gathering of 30 – 35 people.

Well it was an opportunity I couldn’t just miss. My golden opportunity, to get to hear Raghu live that too after 4 years. And most importantly would get to hear his ‘Full’ songs, considering on his site all I get to hear is few lines of his songs.

Besides I was meeting Raghu in person after 2.5 years. But amazingly it just didn’t feel that way. Yes lots has happened in our lives in these years passed by, which we were not aware of. However the friendship and warmth was just the same. That’s why some one rightly said “The Best Friendship doesn’t come when your together, it comes when your apart and when you realize that despite distances and silence…The friendship survives”

As the performance began you could see Raghu dressed in something which had a ethnic yet contemporary feel to it, just like his music. The ambiance just enhanced the performance. Inspite of Raghu being not being accompanied by his band , the strumming of his guitar with his eyes closed, his unique voice and the melodious notes of the ghunghroos (that he wore in his feet to give his music a rustic feel ) just won the hearts of gathering of the audience. Everyone in the room, were just amazed but his style. He sang about 7 – 8 songs with a lot of passion.

My all time favorite still remains “ No Man will Love you …Like I Do” I really enjoyed and felt privileged to get to hear his two new songs “ Ambar” and “ Khidki”.

Here are some pictures of the gig so that you can picture the ambiance and stunning performance that really enthralled and entertained the crowd.

Just like every one in the room I thoroughly enjoyed his performance. I am sure his Albums will do very well. For those who have visited his site www.raghudixit.comand like his music. You can SMS OML Raghu to 7575 to get to know more about his album release or concerts.

Just hang in there …

They say life is like a circle …what goes around comes back…What I mean it has these cycles of happy moments and sad moments. And the trick is to just hang in there

Well exactly a year back on 26th July 2005 many many families in Mumbai lost their lives, families, belongings and homes. Life does take a turn and at times it takes years to overcome a loss or sometimes things drastically happen that one doesn’t expect but it just compensates for the loss.

My dad always said “Acche din nahi rahe to Boore din bhi nahi rahenge”

As I drove to office this morning I remembered my friend Joy and my family friend Dilip uncle. Dilip uncle has 4 feet water in his house ..luckly his neighbours managed to rescued his aged parents when he was stranded in a train.

Joy too had lost a lot last year and seen sights that he would probably not forget for a lifetime. On at this day last time all I heard from him was "I am safe but I have lost everything". I remember how scared we were as we had no contact there after for quite a few days. But life has taken a 360 degree turn.

As this point, God has showered his blessings on him. He not only is a proud owner of his new 2 BHK ‘Home” but also has met his soul mate- Home maker
( finalized the wedding date as well).

As for Dilip Uncle he too has settled and won a court case pending foe last many years. And is excitedly preparing his new 3 BKH where he shifts in the coming week.

I am really happy for both of them as they are truly deserve people and what amazes me about them is the positive attitude I noticed in both of them. They laughed and joked about their loss. And most importantly, they just displayed immense faith and courage.

For those who many not have had such drastic changes …a humble request …”Just Hang In There… coz good things are just round the corner".

Down Memory Lane – He Man

I am too excited today. As I was just scanning through some blogs I
discovered He Man on one of them… Remember him?

One of the few famous children’s programs on Doordarshan in the late ‘80.That too
when Doordarshan had just turned from black and white to colour (Was 1982 I
think!)We wouldn’t miss any of them for the world. Few names that I can recollect are Chitrahaar,He -Man, Giant Robert, Spider Man, Lucy, Fraggle rock, Nightrider and Different Strokes.

What’s amazing is that in times of having 100 satellite channels to
choose from . I experienced the same excitement I did years back when I would
anxiously wait for these serials. In fact all my colleagues and friends whom I shared the link with felt the same way. It was like re living a childhood. It was a great feeling.

It only proves ‘Old is Gold’

Do check the link below. If you were a He Man fan in the ‘80. I can assure you a
trip down memory lane full of excitement and nostalgia.

Here’s the link… Do let me know what you feel.
http://blog.broomfieldpcdoctors.com/

Different FOLKS…Different STROKES !

‘Kabhi kabhi to ek lamha hi kafi hota hai aur kabhi kabhi to ek zindagi bhi kaam lagne lagti hai …’ filmy as it may sound it refers to trying to understand and connect with one and other. Reference here is specifically to Men and Women relationships.


‘Once upon a time Maritians and Venusians met, fell in love, and had a happy relationship together because they respected and accepted their differences. Then they came to earth and amnesia set in, they forgot they were from different planets.’ John Gray beautifully uses this metaphor in his book Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. I like the way he in such simple words sums up the reasons for unhappy relationships in today’s times.

It’s strange but inspite of immense differences people still get attracted to one and other or take decisions of living a life time together. I know of many couples who barely met but took a decision of spending a life time together. Matrimonial sites in today’s time act as similar platforms to connect people from different communities or locations. This system seems to be working beautifully though people still condemn these short stints before taking a plunge and yet advocate ‘Love marriages’ where at least people claim to understand and know each other better.

At times I feel that it’s just a matter of chance …or is it an effort, maturity, acceptance, trust, understanding, compromise, right balance, space, respect, patience and love at play.

Just this afternoon, Ruchi a college friend of mine talked about drastic difference in taste pallets between her husband and her yet how beautifully they seemed to have worked it out. She gave me a cute example of how he loved crisp food items and she preferred soft. So they have identified a south Indian dish ( The Dosa ) as a common dish to share and enjoy together as it takes care of both their likings.

My Mama (Uncle ) and Mami ( Aunt) are a yet another example. In the initial years of marriage all they could see were vast differences between each other. Simple things like she loved dancing and he hated the idea seemed to matter so much. Today it’s surprising to see that they are not only the 1st couple on the dance floor and last to leave. What is worth noting that they also thoroughly enjoy this act of togetherness?

I guess that’s why they say … “To get a little at times it is important to bend a little”

The point I am trying to make today is that by continuing to recognize and explore differences, new ways can be discovered to make any relationship work miraculously and last a life time. However it’s a continuing process and requires great effort from both partners.

I have begun to understand this and trying to put apply the same in my relationships and life. Hoping sincerely that this understanding and effort brings in my world beautiful, healthy and life lasting relationships.

Surrender

‘Surrender ’is exactly the message that I have been receiving last one week from the universe. But what is surrender? I am not sure if I understand it. I fear it too … I guess the fear of the un known. What my understanding of the concept un till today was that “Surrender is letting go or handing over charge of ones self to the universe. Let the universe steer your journey …let yourself flow with it”

But handing over charge or loosing control …that’s insane, how is it possible to do so ?, that were my initial reactions. But the constant messages coming to me via different mediums seem to have merit in exploring the unknown.

Today in the Meditation session Prasad ( the Reki master ) brought it up again . That’s when I couldn’t resist but innocently asked what ‘Surrender’ really meant.

That’s when he explained that Surrender was beyond just loosing control. It was loosing oneself. He said that when one surrenders they should not expect any outcome of the act. But one should be ready to experience the unexpected that comes from it. It required complete trust and a strong sense of faith, commitment and courage to accept whatever it brings along. Courage has genius, power and magic.

He definitely assured us that it was worth exploring because the experiences that surrender brought along were unexplainable and blissful. It sounded very appealing…

To bring more clarity, a lady in the class shared an example from the epic Mahabharata which illustrated the true meaning of Surrender. When Draupati ( wife of the 5 Pandav brothers) was being disrobed in a court room in front of everyone she called Lord Krishna for help …but she kept holding on to her sari from the waist ..Due to the fear of being disrobed completely. Out of desperation she angrily asked Lord Krishna why he was letting this happen to her. Why was he not helping her to avoid the insult especially when she has called him for her help. That’s when Lord Krishna explained to her that while she had called him for help she had not surrendered completely and was still holding on to her sari at her waist ...Its then when Draupati realized the true meaning of surrender and held her hands up in the air. That’s when Lord Krishna came to her true rescue and yards and yards of sari kept unfurling until the Kauravas got tired of trying to disrobing Draupati.

While I understand the essence of Surrender however I still don’t understand it in a complete sense. There surely seems merit in giving it a try. Struggled enough on my own …It was now worth trying to surrender and watch what the universe brings forth.

Where to begin still is a question that comes to mind ? But as Prasad put it one must try surrendering smaller things in life and soon one will find the mystery unfurling as if it never existed, making the journey more and more enjoyable.

Yippee … We Are Back !

It’s strange how we seem to get attached to little things in life. I am talking about My Blog .

Thanks to the ban on blogs by the Government of India last 3 – 4 days every one in the blogging community seemed to be restless and curious. There has been speculation that the ban was connected to the recent Mumbai Train Blasts. Probably the groups behind the bomb blasts used blogs to exchange information and co-ordinate the plan so the Government decided to ban these sites.

Well what ever the reason inspite of my relationship with my Blog being so short and recent , I still experienced restlessness and a sense of attachment .

It felt like an important dairy or something very close to me had got misplaced. I had friends who follow up on my blog show concern and inquire why the blog was not accessible.

I have realised yet again ( after 2 .5 long years ) that no matter how short the association may be sometimes surprizing the connect and associations that they form with us last for a life time . I wonder if this attachment is right or wrong. But then again ‘Right or Wrong’ is purely circumstancial .

Prem Sagar Uncle many years back shared this truth with me that has till dated remained with me as his golden words. He said “There is no right or wrong…at a particular situation or time your decision may seem right to you but the same decion may seem wrong at another point of time . So don’t bother much and just listen to your heart. What ever the desion never regret it “

I know I am totally off my subject today … but I think just putting down random thoughts that I feel at the moment.

But the brighter side of all this is that it was hearting and very encouraging to know from a couple of friends who follow up my blog that they were looking forward to more thoughts from me. Thanks Meena, Shivani, Ameeta Bhabhi, Madhu and Biren. It’s friends lilke you who make “ Keep on Keeping on “

Cheers !

The way I look at it ...

Its’ funny, the reactions I have been getting to my blog from various people who read it. For those who have known me for long and seem known this part of me think it’s a beautiful way of expression.

There is another lot of people who have known for long nut not really been in touch with my reality who think that this is being too spiritual (which I don’t totally agree with as this is just one aspect of my personality not the only).

Then there are the ones who are either getting to know me or recently met me who seemed most confused of the lot as they read deep thought on my blog and when they chat or meet with me they see some who is up to mischief, full of life, people’s person, caring etc

To begin with I don’t think maturity has much to do with age. I also think that being spiritual at a young age is just an awesome way of living as one doesn’t live a superficial life all along fooling one self that they are really happy or content and one fine day find themselves struggling to change their ways to live a better life.

I think there is nothing wrong in being emotional either. Emotions are beautiful they shape a personality. Does being spiritual or person who observes life carefully or tries to constantly learn from ones mistakes makes them a saint or dull or boring.

Definitely NOT! There are so many people i come across, examples being Yashi aunty …she is so full for fun and masti that at times I wonder if she really is as old as she looks …and that graceful graying hair is just a farce. Or Bhaskar my friend from Art of living who amazes me by the way he lives his life ( I guess he is my inspiration to follow my heart and do as I please) and a whole lot of like minded people I meet. So many of them are younsteers my age or younger. But they have surely started learning and accepting realities of life rather than being ignorant ... Yet they enjoy Life to the fullest with gratitude,a stong sense of understanding and aceptance.

Is my post today a justification, definitely not …but just an explanation to those living in 'Ignorance’ or 'Denial of reality 'and think my ways are crazy, or that i have a long way to go before I start thinking the way i do today ..

I sincerely hope they too experience the beauty of 'Self Love’ and ‘Selfless Love” soon ...and find the path that leads to living a realistic yet Happy life !

High on LIFE !!

As they say ‘Expect the unexpected’. That’s exactly what I experienced today, and it was the surely soul stirring. It all began when I received a message from an acquaintance called Abhijit.

Abhijit only re assures my belief about there are 3 kinds of people in our life . One who come for a ‘Reason’ and as the reason (the reason is generally involves self empowerment and growth) is fulfilled they move away, two the ones who are there for a ‘Season’ that may be temprorary but brings joy and learning and the third that last remain for a ‘Life time’that last forever. I have so far in my journey of life met each one of the above. Abhijit from the day I met surely felt was here for a reason but sincerely hope remains for a life time.

We met in Dec 2005 at a party and didn’t know each other at all. Though, I had heard about him from a couple of common friends that we had. What amazed me about his personality was that he looked so much at peace with himself and in a place where people were totally high on alcohol he was the only one who seemed to be ‘High on Life’ and really enjoying the moment. We both discovered a few common interests and felt a strange yet a very strong connection. I guess that’s what they call a Karmic connection. We kept in touch and I always wondered what the secret to his spirits were.

Until today when I got invited to attend a meditation session with a Reki master called Prasad. I reached a bit late but as I entered a small room filled with 20- 30 people mainly youngsters I just felt very comforting vibes. Abhijit and I acknowledge each other and I quietly sat down, As I got comfortable I experienced a strong flow of universal energy flowing from my hands (usually happens to Reki channels, I am one of them though not regular with the practice)

Soon I heard a very humble voice instructing us to close our eyes and started to lead us into meditation. There were very soothing chants that kept playing in the background. The chants were in different languages and had Krishna Hare Krishna mingled in phrases. I couldn’t see the face to the voice that lead the meditation but there were different facets of the persons personality that I could experience …there was stillness, stability , peace , joy , unconditional love, quest, wisdom, pain for ignorance, naughtiness and much more. The voice questioned us about ‘coming home’ it directed us to use our healing powers to heal ourselves, guided us to the path of total surrender ( in fact this bit was my favorite ) and introduced us to our angel who gave us a message too…I received a message that kind of put me to ease and brought a smile on my face. I experienced different emotions , at times I was extremely happy and on a complete high, at times really sad. As I placed my palms at the Heart Chakra I felt a lot of energy flowing from my palms which was a clear indication that I needed to start my practice of Reki to heal myself. The over all experience was very over whelming.

As the session ended I was a peace with myself and felt a joy that cant be explained. As I opened my eyes I was surprised to see the one who lead us into the meditation…Prasad it was, some one really tall, well built and very young( looked barely in his early 30’s). What was amazing about Prasad was the glow on his face, that look of total surrender to life and above all the undying faith of his disciples in his room. He seemed to have touched many lives and guided them to the hidden treasures of happiness and content in life. The room was overflowing with positive energy.

Some people shared what they experienced during the meditation. I too shared my feelings. A young guy shared his close encounter with death on Tuesday as he was in one of the adjoining trains which got affected by the blast. It was very touching and every one in the room felt deep gratitude towards the universe for his safety, that of themselves and loved ones. There was a sense of immense grief for the victims and heart felt prayers. It felt like one big Family. As it was Guru Purnima on Tuesady every one had very lovingly bought gifts for their teacher Prasad. There was a wonderful demonstration of love and affection in the room. I was touched deeply.

As I drove back home I experienced deep stillness, joy, and immense gratitude .I was very quite and with myself but at a lot of peace. I still don’t know why I kept smiling without any reason. It was a wonderful family I had met and intend to slowly but surely become part of this family.

Being ‘High on life’ is surely a wonderful experience and I am confident that thanks to my quest the universe in it’s own miraculous ways is guiding me to the right path to achieve it.

The Raghudixit project

Raghupati Dixit … that’s a bhari bhadkam name, isn’t it? Just like the personality. Well he is lovingly called Raghu. I met him 4 yrs back in Bangalore. The reason I write about him is coz he is a Musician with a DIFFRENCE …actually already a ‘Star’ to all his fans.

Well I do not understand too much of music but, Raghu’s unique voice, folksy yet contemporary style of music caught my attention when my friend/colleague in Bangalore called KK took me for a concert of a one man band called ‘Antragani’. KK raved about them through out the journey. As they were then the Radio City music contests winners.

We reached late and had to sit on the stairs but that was some showing I have ever attended …The crowd was cheering, dancing and enjoying every beat. The music had brilliant use of drums, amazing violin (I began to enjoy the violin ever since) flute, guitar that Raghu played him self and above all his unique voice.

I too had my feet tapping... the music was charismatic and very different from what I have ever heard. I was completely in awe of his style of music and his “Mysore se aayi’ song with interesting folksy music had the crowd going wild. They call his style of music Indo World Folk Rock.

I was at that point scouting to tie up with an Indian fusion band for my then client Coffee Board of India’s participation as a host country at the largest International coffee trade fair at Boston (USA). There began my quest to hunt for a man called Raghupati Dixit.

It was crazy as all I knew was that he was a Radio city winner …After much research and networking I got through a voice mail with a heavy Bangalore / Mysore accent saying “Hi I am not home please leave your name and number after a beep …Ting tong !” Well the Ting tong was his door bell that got captured in the voice message. I left many messages and didn’t get a reply till one day I left a message asking him to call me back and instructed him ( almost a polite request actually) to change the DAMN Bell or the message that ends with a TING TONG as its BLOODY irritating. And that’s what got Raghu to call me back :-)

Raghu managed to sweep every one at Coffee Board off their feet.Ms. Venkatachalam the then chairperson got nostalgic about her college days every time she heard Raghu's guitar and music. But as luck would have it Raghu and Antragani couldn’t make it to Boston due to some visa issues.

But thanks to this quest I discovered an awesome musician and a good friend.

I am a BIG fan of his music. I see alot of depth in his lyrics too. Like his song on 'In mumbai , waiting for a miricle' so beautifuly describes his experiences in the city of dreams Mumbai.There was another song he had composed with children of all age group from the Bangalore school of music , can't recollect the name of the song but I remember I use to realy enjoy listening to it. Though my all time favorite song is “No Man will ever love you like I do’.

Unfortunately, then I use to have a Demo CD of his music,which I sharafat se returbed before getting back to Mumbai ...I wish I hadn't :-(. Now all I get to hear is the snapshots on his songs on his website.

Like most of his fans I am anxiously waiting for his album to release by end of this year. Antragani the band doesn’t exist but Raghu has initiated something called “The RaghuDixit Project” and they are geared up to release an album called ‘Folk the System'. I wish him and his band the very best always. I know he is going to make it BIG soon :-)

If you wish to experience his soul stirring music, lyrics and get to know more about Raghu and "The Raghudixit project" do visit http://www.raghudixit.com

Mumbai does it again ...

11th July 2006, yet another sad day that shall be remembered in the history of Mumbai. Yes I am referring to the shocking serial blast (8 blasts within 11 mins) in the local trains of Mumbai (The life line of Mumbai). Hundreds of people have lost their lives yet again and lot more injured. It reminded every one of the nightmarish serial blast of 1993.

It created panic and chaos amongst Mumbaikars. Trains were stalled and thus Mumbaikars got on to the road in panic to reach home safely. With a fear of not knowing if their loved ones would reach home safely. Phone lines got jammed mobile networks blocked. I too lived the fear as after the 1st blast. Luckily I informed my Mom not to take the train that she does usually at the time and she decided to hit the road. For the next hour all news channels were airing news of series of blast that took place one after the other.

It was very scary for a while as I couldn’t get in touch with my mother who I knew had taken the road nor my sister whose office was very close to the 1st blast location. Finally after a few hours my sister had the presence of mind to try reaching out to me via the internet to inform that she was safe and home. It was a bit of relief. For hours there after, we were worried about my mom who was untraceable. Strangely my uncle from Delhi got through her and informed us about her where about. But the tension prevailed until she reached home after 3-4 hrs on the road.

While I stayed back in office and then decided to venture out on the roads at 11:30 pm. with a few colleagues. It took me 2 hrs at midnight to reach home. But the site on the roads was heartening and really touched me in some way.

There was traffic which was almost crawling, buses were packed and bursting out of it’s seems. Ambulances, were trying to reach hospitals. People on the roads were stuck in the traffic jam for hours. It was unbelievable to see loads of people on the roads reaching out to every car, bus and taxi offering drinking water, some offered tea, biscuits, etc. People were helping cops direct traffic.There were women, children and senior citizens offering these services.

I was really touched by this display of humanity and unconditional service towards one and other. Here caste didn’t seem to matter, nor did age nor status. Every one was just there to support each other to face the crisis bravely.

It’s this undying spirit of Mumbai that constantly inspite of the odds it seems to be facing in recent times gets each Mumbaikar proudly claim “ Aamchi Mumbai"

My work of Art ! - Pictures

Kneading

Kneading on the wheel

Centering

The Perfect centering

Opening using the thumbs

Estimating the cylinder

Ready to make a cylinder

Cylinder in process

The Perfect Cylinder

My latest CREATION !

Me the potter !

Well... for those who have read my post "My Creation" will know my latest passion - Pottery. I am really enjoying it and now moved to an advanced course. Just thought i must share some pictures of why i enjoy Pottery so much ...

Yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de ...

Ae zindagi yeh lamha jee lene de
Oh, pehle se likha kuch bhi nahin
Roz naya kuch likhti hai tu
Jo bhi likha hai, dil se jiya hai
Yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de - 2
Maasoom si hasi, bevaja hi kabhi
Honton pe khil jaati hai
Anjaan si khushi baheti hui kabhi
Saahil pe mil jaati hai
Yeh anjaana sa darr ajnabi hai magar
Khoobsurat hai jee lene de
Yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de - 2
Dil hi mein rehta hai, aankhon mein baheta hai
Kaccha sa ek khwaab hai
Lagta sawaal hai, shaayad jawaab hai
Dil phir bhi betaab hai
Yeh sukun hai to hai, yeh junoon hai to hai
Khoobsurat hai jee lene de
Yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de ...
Oh, pehle se likha kuch bhi nahin
Roz naya kuch, oh likhti hai tu
Jo bhi likha hai, dil se jiya hai
Yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de ...

These are lyrics of a beautiful song from a film called ‘Filhaal’. I just enjoy the song and lyrics every time I hear or read them. What really amazes me is that each time I discover a new meaning to it.

May be it’s the moment that I am in that defines it’s meaning or the state of my mind or current experiences / learning’s that gives the lyrics a new dimension.

Which only explains the ‘impermanence’ of moments and life in general?

Goenka ji the founder of Vipassana meditation camps always Anichya…Anichaya’ which I am told means this too is not constant this too will change.

The other day I called up Yashi aunty telling her I was really happy and strangely there was no real reason to be. But I was too full of life and it was a feeling I wanted to share with her. She giggled and said that she was happy for me but I needed to enjoy the feeling with the awareness that this too will change.

My understanding so far is to just be aware of the moment and what it offers with the true understanding that ‘This will change too!’

Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna!

Well yes it’s the title of Karan Johar’s upcoming film (which incidentally has all my Favorite stars and I am looking forward to watch it) it’s also the subject of my post today.

I have observed that I am uncomfortable with Good Byes. I am wondering why though? When I mean by a Good Bye is when we part for a longer duration.

Like when I quit my 1st Job at Oberoi Multimedia or when Reshma (my best friend) got married and left for Canada or when I was leaving from Bangalore after a 4 months stint at Lowe Bangalore office where I had made so many great friends or when I quit Lowe ( my 2nd job and after a stint of 3.5 yrs ) and CD (My ex boss) stood there talking to me on my last day or when a lot of my colleagues move on.

It’ not like that life comes to a stand still nor that I do loose touch with people easily but I think some where I have experienced that things don’t remain same. Though some one new always seems to take place of the old and the void surely gets filled. However there is a discomfort …may be it’s just in my mind.

I remember when I was leaving Bangalore and went say a Good Bye to Ms. Laxmi Venkatachalam (The then chairperson of the Coffee Board of India) she just said “I refuse to bid you a good bye or accept yours either coz I know soon you will be back and I will get to meet and work with you again” This loving statement stayed with me ever since but surely she too like me seems uncomfortable with the simple sounding word ‘Good Bye’.

Are we all uncomfortable or is it just me …I am still to solve this riddle in my mind.

I don’t know if need to solve it though…just as Eckhart Tolle in his book “Stillness Speaks” beautifully answers my confusion "Sometimes surrender means giving up trying to understand and becoming comfortable with not knowing"

The Undying Spirit of Mumbai !

Mumbaikars time and again prove their true spirit. Be it the Mumbai riots n 1997 or the torrential rains of 26th July 2005 that has left scars that still remind everyone f their loss and brings out fear.

Today yet again we were almost close to history repeating itself yet again after non stop rain for the 4th day. Luckily my family and me took the decision of staying back home and I think it was a wise one. At 3 pm we decided to take a peek at what it was like on the roads since there was no electricity since 10 am and we were kind of cut off from what really was happening out there. We began with exploring our terrace to get a top view of the area where we live in. The terrace on the 8th floor does justice to the view. We were shocked at the sight we saw of the Juhu circle and the Juhu bus stand. There was chaos, a bad traffic jam, roads clogged with water, people trying to wade through the water. As we watched we saw a tree across the road fall. Luckily no body got hurt.

The view just made us more curious to get close to reality had get t see what really was happening on the roads. As we reached the building gate we were taken aback by the sight. There was water a little below knee length, chaos, cars struggling t find their way, and young boys helping people push their cars that shut down due to the water, lots of office goers struggling through water trying to get back home, siren of the ambulance, police vans, some street children playing happily in the water, worried looks on the car owners as they tried to reach home.

What really was heartening was to see young boys from building acting as responsible citizens and running around in the water and the rain to help the traffic police direct the cars and people walking back home. Some people were distributing biscuits, chocolates and also thanking these young men who selflessly helped every one around. I think they are true heros …The site was very touching. I did try t camputer a few moments from my camera phone.

The authorities don’t seem to have their learnt lesson after the last years experiences. True Mumbaikar and their undying spirit still make it a city worth living. I am proud to be a Mumbaikar !

The true 'Super Hero'

This is a mail that a good friend of mine Joydeep ( Joy as we lovingly call him) sent me last year post the 26th July 2005 torrential rains in Mumbai . This mail shook me up completely and still gives me goose bumps.

26th July 2005 'The unfateful day' that left behind painful lasting marks on many lives.

People lost a lot... their homes, loved ones and lives. Joy too lost a lot and it's taken him a long time to over come the nightmare. But i think he is a 'Super Hero'. The mail below will explain why i say so ...


Dear Friends,
Tuesday, 26th July will always remain a black letteredday for all people of Mumbai. The fury of nature was at its best and we realized that no one can be spared once we confront the forces. It started like a normal day, people rushing to their offices, traffic was moving as usual, but things took a very dramatic turnat 3:00 PM when the skies opened up and people werecaught in the middle of no where. People were confused and running for cover, to wait for the rains to stop,they didn’t have the slightest clue of what was awaiting for them. Within an hour the entire city wasengulfed in water and home seemed like a place far away. Some people decided to stay back where ever theywere, office, school, in car, bus, railway station and some decided to walk. I can’t comment which decisionwas wiser because everyone had to endure the misery.

I decided to walk home from my office, everything seemed normal till I reached the corner of my house.The sight I saw will surely haunt me for the rest ofmy life. I couldn’t see my apartment, which is on theground floor. It had totally submerged under water.People were hanging on to whatever they could, treetrunks, stranded cars and buses and they could feel that its going to be a never ending moment for them.

Icould some how manage to reach home, the force of the water was not less than 100 Kms an hour and so manytimes I could feel I was going to drown. The surrounding wall of our building had collapsed. Myneighbors on the first floor rushed to my help andbrought me to safety. I was lucky enough to save mymobile phone which helped me and others in thebuilding to communicate with their family members. Butthe misery had just begun. I saw people outside our building stranded in the bus and the water was rising.It had reached the windows of the bus and I could feeltheir nightmare, they were going to suffocate till death. There was no sign of any rescue operation, no fire brigade, no police no body. We tried to call the emergency numbers and then we realized that thenumbers are just for decoration as there is no one onthe other side of the phone. People were flowing awayin the water, screaming for help, and we could justwatch. The hero of the moment was the brave busdrivers and conductors who decided to stay with the stranded passengers.

The water, electricity, cellphones, all became dead. So many of our family members were untraceable. We were praying for their wellbeing. The fire brigade showed up at 2 am, to rescue thepeople in the bus and stranded on our building roof.Somehow they managed to evacuate them with life boats,but within an hour they disappeared. The night was never ending; we could hear people screaming for help,holding on to whatever they got. The morning came and we were able to see the damage done by the floods, the water was still neck deep and people still stranded and there was still no sign of any rescue operation.

No men in uniform were visible neither were the news reporters perhaps they decided to wait and watch the fun and work on their scripts.That was the moment when we took up the responsibility to evacuate people. We went out and into the water. I was joined by many localites who decided to forget their loss and help people reach home. This is Mumbai,we don’t need our so called brave men in uniform to come to the rescue, within moments a full scale rescue operation was launched by us, we made ropeways extending more than two kilometers and giving instructions to stranded people and guiding them tosafety. There were generous people who brought food and refreshments for the trapped people. School kids were cheered up, and we encouraged people move on. We could see the gratefulness in their eyes, and that they were finally on their way home. The volunteers got whatever they cud to evacuate people, make shiftboats, life saving boats, tubes. Women and childrenwere given top priority. The look in their eyes mademe forget my loss. The blessing I got from the people was more than I could ask for. Free food and tea was served to people even though milk and other necessities were disappearing from the market.

This city never gives up, the people are brave and their never say die attitude will always be a legend. 6hours had passed and the rescue operations were stillon and still no sign of any men in uniform. The prideof our nation, the Indian Air Force was generous enough to entertain us with an aerial display for 2seconds and disappear. We had by then evacuated more then 3000 people to safety and more and more volunteers joined in to help us. Water started receding and we were getting news about the havoc caused by the floods, just few kilometers away from myhouse people had drowned and their dead bodies were floating. People had died of suffocation in cars and buses.I could see my apartment later that day and decided totake a peek.

The water inside was still knee lengthand everything was destroyed. My clothes, TV,refrigerator, washing machine, food, utensils etc we recovered with water and turned black. But I didn’t feel any pain, because the entire episode had given me something that nothing and no one can take away. HOPEand WILL TO SURVIVE. I was still alive and breathing and I know I will survive through this. I am deeplygrateful to my neighbors who helped me with food and shelter, my friends for their encouragement, my familyand relatives for their support and as long as I have all of you by my side, I can survive through anysituations in life. And of course the attitude of the people of Mumbai, their unity and their strength.

It may take months to overcome the loss, but this too shall pass. My deepest condolences are with the familymembers who lost their near and dears ones, I pray to God to give them shelter and peace. We realize the value of life when we go through a phase likethis...and as long as you are breathing, there isstill hope. What I endured is nothing compared to people stranded for hours without food and drinkingwater. Thanks to our men in uniform and politicians who madeus realize that counting on them for help is a wasteof time.I once again thank you all for your good wishes,support and prayers. Lets all pray that we never get to experience a moment like this ever in our life.

Regards,
Joy

Drift away ...

Is it coincidence that we meet strangers in life and inspite of them being drastically different from us in terms of likes, dislikes, opinions, sensitivities, attitude and lifestyle we still befriend them. Surely it’s a karmic connection that has come to enrich us and make us aware of little realities of life.

It’s difficult to adjust to vast differences but still for some strange reason we try to accommodate to one another. Try to look at the positives in one another and highlight true strengths. Needs a lot of patience and understanding to maintain and grow this friendship. However, better understanding only brings along expectation. And within no time the expectations start to grow.

At times the friendship very unlikely to grow becomes stronger and last a lifetime and the ones that are sure to last seem to start fading away. I think it an effort required both ways. Both need to understand each others sensitivities and help one another grow. One can try to accommodate but if the insensitivity on the others part gets unbearable and painful, it’s ok to drift away! I don’t like the feel of it. Drifting away is painful too but recently I have learnt that loving ones self and respecting our own feelings is crucial. Only when we can respect and love our self can we reach out with our true inner feelings to enrich the other. It surely doesn’t imply that one doesn’t care for the other but it’s important not to let anybody how ever close hurt us and belittle us.

I also strongly believe that if there is sincerity, true love, understanding and respect in a friendship no matter how long or how much the distance one surely connects back and the bond inspite the distance only gets stronger.

While I am drifting away right now, I believe if it’s meant to last, my true friendship will surely sustain.

Do you fear GOD ?

Do you fear GOD? Well that’s the question posed to me by a fellow colleague after reading my blog. To think of it over the years my understanding and relationship with what I today call “The Divine or Universal energy” has evolved.

As a child my introduction to GOD was limited to a “Form”. The Mighty God as I knew him then was a magician who could make anything possible. Provided you were a good obeying child who prayed and thanked GOD for his blessings and mercies. He also had the Powers to punish you if u were wrong …Yes in some way then I did fear GOD (the un known)

As I grew up …life took a 360 degree turn. There came a phase where I started to lose everything …my loved ones, my confidence, my faith in my own ability, faith that any good could happen to me. And that’s when I began to question the Mighty Magician. Why Why WHY ? Why me? I had not done any wrong then why of all the people I became his victim. I was angry and upset and believed he was unfair.

That’s when came into my life my angel “Yashi aunty” (who I lovingly also call my surrogate mother). She tried hard to instill faith back into my life. She kept convincing me that I wasn’t the victim but “The Chosen One”. I argued and fought with her concepts but her magnetic faith an undying confidence in the ways of the universe kept me holding on to what ever she said. I don’t think I really understood at that point but just kept taking in what she said as golden words. It was almost as though every drop of wisdom that I kept gathering and storing within me would some day emerge as a forceful and mighty ocean.

Within no time magical incidents kept occurring in my life. The more I thought I had lost the double I seem to gain in the most unexpected ways. I kept feeling that the right people arrived and the right things kept happening just when I least expected them. Like when I lost my confidence and my faith up came Anand ( my Mentor, friend, guide ) who not only helped me gain my faith in myself back but also became part of our family and stood by us . Helped us stand on our feet again. Inspite of losing out on my MBA degree came up an unexpected offer from Lintas – leading advertising agency of India. It surely gave my career a great boost and I have never had to look back ever since. Having had to loose out on the cars we had came a double promotion that made me be able to fulfill my biggest dream of buying my own car …this list of miracles is just endless. It all seemed as though it was staged and some one up there was pulling the strings.

Soon I began to see and understand the true meaning of all that what Yashi aunty had instilled in me. I saw it happen. I did realize that I truly was “ The Chosen One” Though I faced alot of hardship but each event made me stronger and more aware of reality. It not only increased faith in myself but also the fact that there was a supreme guiding force that was with me every moment. Some one I didn’t need to fear. I began to converse to this universal force shared my admiration, anger, love , hate, dreams, fears …everything.I befriended it

Today I strongly believe that this universal energy makes every moment in my life ‘Worth it’ eventually. It’s my biggest strength, my supporter and my magician who’s there with me every moment and knows what’s best for me …Would I really fear GOD anymore ?